Post by anglocyte on Dec 30, 2010 22:37:34 GMT -5
Hello, I'm new to the site. Looking for training. I already know what I'm supposed to be starting with: my yoga, meditation, breathing exercises. I fell off the wagon, started smoking again(really bad for me) and it all went downhill from there. Will be quitting and renewing my training new years. Not as a resolution but simply because it's a nice rounded off date to start so to speak. I could use advice on other physical/mental exercises/techniques. Plus if anyone lives in the central FL area I would enjoy actually making a local friend with same interests. Or dare I hope....finding a trainer/master. I promise I won't kill you if I ever surpass you.
The more I read the more I'm on the verge of following the Sith. There is alot happening in my life that it would take too much too spill out here.
Plus it's way too personal. I'm starting to realize alot about myself and family/friends(?)...and it's not good. I've played my life too safe and wore my heart on my sleeve. I knew there were alot of self-absorbed persons in my life but blinded myself to the degree of it and the effects it has had on me. They have drained me. No blame, it's my own responsibility what's happened(my life-past/present). I clung to certain persons because I was afraid of being alone and was programmed to sacrifice my needs(desires) for others due to christianity. Even though I abandoned that quagmire for agnosticism years ago it still had its residual effects. Then I fell into the karmic eastern mysticism BS. "All that is not given is lost" "Bad people will eventually destroy themselves with their own negativity" blah blah. I'm no longer wasting my time waiting to see evil get its due.
In my opinion there are 2 types of evil people: One are your genuine sociopaths who are emotionless except for the pleasure they derive from the suffering of others. Especially if they are the ones to cause that suffering. Then it's all the more delectable to them. Fortunately I believe these to be few in number compared to the latter. They are not rehabilitative.
The 2nd type are people who commit evil due to insecurity/paranoia. I realize every day through exposure that these are many and growing rapidly. It goes beyond just feeding upon the misfortunes of others to appease their miserable/lazy/ambitiousness lives. Through word and deed they try to bring about peoples destruction. Rumors, gossip, back-stabbing are their usual methods. Often in the form of insinuation due to lacking balls to say/do it themselves, or to plant the seed in another to implicate them, or simply because they enjoy the covert destructiveness of it. Usually jealous....you simply make more money than they, drive a nicer car, look better or have a better looking spouse, refuse to have sex with them or are getting more ass than them, etc. They may not even know you well but these insecurities(of theirs)are all it takes for them to dislike/hate you and act upon it even if it is just in the form of slander. And yes, I'm a believer someone can destroy you with just words. ("Sticks and stones" my ass.) Especially if the like-minded are eagerly there to lap it up and spread it farther even if it is unfounded. They would never admit their hatred(obsession with you)because that would be regarded as a sign of weakness in this society. That being, even though it was never YOUR purpose,...."you got to them". You know what I mean by this. Fortunately you can be protected by a reputation that you've established but that only offers so much protection and action sometimes has to be taken. I no longer fool myself about how alto of people are. I feel so foolish. I feel like I'm waking up from a long drug induced trance or something. It's like a flimsy veil has been ripped away.
Look at the TV. That idiot box is a perfect reflection of what our society has become. What's most popular on there? Reality shows or anything where people are fighting over trivial crap. And the love of watching someone crash and burn! It's what sells. It's what's marketable. It's where are society is heading and it's getting worse.
I've finally(at the late age of 47, what a dumbass!)come to realize that it's a matter of survival. For you and those who deserve your love. And you must become stronger to make your way in this insane asylum. And that will mean driving away or, if necessary, cutting down these vampiric pieces of trash.
Sorry to come on so strong during "just an introduction" but as I said there is alot surfacing/coming to head in my life.
I am sincere about the request for assistance in training. I don't want to become a cruel, dark, destructive force but I would being lying if I said I don't enjoy watching evil get its due. I want the means to protect myself(and those I care for)and that appears to be best done with offense more than defense in my opinion. "Let them throw the first punch" bullshit. If you know there going to strike you(physical or otherwise)why wait? My father owned a bar and saw people killed(or permanently disabled) by one blow. Not because the person was exceptionally skilled but they just happened to hit the right spot at the right time.
The more I read the more I'm on the verge of following the Sith. There is alot happening in my life that it would take too much too spill out here.
Plus it's way too personal. I'm starting to realize alot about myself and family/friends(?)...and it's not good. I've played my life too safe and wore my heart on my sleeve. I knew there were alot of self-absorbed persons in my life but blinded myself to the degree of it and the effects it has had on me. They have drained me. No blame, it's my own responsibility what's happened(my life-past/present). I clung to certain persons because I was afraid of being alone and was programmed to sacrifice my needs(desires) for others due to christianity. Even though I abandoned that quagmire for agnosticism years ago it still had its residual effects. Then I fell into the karmic eastern mysticism BS. "All that is not given is lost" "Bad people will eventually destroy themselves with their own negativity" blah blah. I'm no longer wasting my time waiting to see evil get its due.
In my opinion there are 2 types of evil people: One are your genuine sociopaths who are emotionless except for the pleasure they derive from the suffering of others. Especially if they are the ones to cause that suffering. Then it's all the more delectable to them. Fortunately I believe these to be few in number compared to the latter. They are not rehabilitative.
The 2nd type are people who commit evil due to insecurity/paranoia. I realize every day through exposure that these are many and growing rapidly. It goes beyond just feeding upon the misfortunes of others to appease their miserable/lazy/ambitiousness lives. Through word and deed they try to bring about peoples destruction. Rumors, gossip, back-stabbing are their usual methods. Often in the form of insinuation due to lacking balls to say/do it themselves, or to plant the seed in another to implicate them, or simply because they enjoy the covert destructiveness of it. Usually jealous....you simply make more money than they, drive a nicer car, look better or have a better looking spouse, refuse to have sex with them or are getting more ass than them, etc. They may not even know you well but these insecurities(of theirs)are all it takes for them to dislike/hate you and act upon it even if it is just in the form of slander. And yes, I'm a believer someone can destroy you with just words. ("Sticks and stones" my ass.) Especially if the like-minded are eagerly there to lap it up and spread it farther even if it is unfounded. They would never admit their hatred(obsession with you)because that would be regarded as a sign of weakness in this society. That being, even though it was never YOUR purpose,...."you got to them". You know what I mean by this. Fortunately you can be protected by a reputation that you've established but that only offers so much protection and action sometimes has to be taken. I no longer fool myself about how alto of people are. I feel so foolish. I feel like I'm waking up from a long drug induced trance or something. It's like a flimsy veil has been ripped away.
Look at the TV. That idiot box is a perfect reflection of what our society has become. What's most popular on there? Reality shows or anything where people are fighting over trivial crap. And the love of watching someone crash and burn! It's what sells. It's what's marketable. It's where are society is heading and it's getting worse.
I've finally(at the late age of 47, what a dumbass!)come to realize that it's a matter of survival. For you and those who deserve your love. And you must become stronger to make your way in this insane asylum. And that will mean driving away or, if necessary, cutting down these vampiric pieces of trash.
Sorry to come on so strong during "just an introduction" but as I said there is alot surfacing/coming to head in my life.
I am sincere about the request for assistance in training. I don't want to become a cruel, dark, destructive force but I would being lying if I said I don't enjoy watching evil get its due. I want the means to protect myself(and those I care for)and that appears to be best done with offense more than defense in my opinion. "Let them throw the first punch" bullshit. If you know there going to strike you(physical or otherwise)why wait? My father owned a bar and saw people killed(or permanently disabled) by one blow. Not because the person was exceptionally skilled but they just happened to hit the right spot at the right time.